Becoming seen as the Bridge Between Worlds - Kerrie's Story.

The kids call her Mermay, instead of Mémé (Nana in French), she has a mermaid tattooed on her foot and she feels an undeniable connection with the Selkie tale (I will be writing a blog on the Selkies one day as it is a tale that lives in my cells too). Her eyes have flickers of ocean turquoise, her incredible family-built home overlooks the Ahipara ocean and the ocean has become her guiding force in the work that she does, supporting women in birthing their babies and rebirthing themselves in the passage of matrescence. There was little question about it, this photoshoot, supporting Kerrie to face her fear of being seen, was to be held by the ocean, at a little private beach 5 minutes from her home.

Kerrie reached out to me a month before after resonating with a reel I posted about the fears that arise around coming out of hiding and becoming seen. While being confident and very personable. Kerrie shares that she has never enjoyed stepping into the spotlight. She notes that she has very few images taken of her over her lifetime and questions whether the fact that she hasn't been noticed, means she hasn't liked to be seen; or the fact that she doesn't like to be seen mean that she has become less noticeable. The chicken or the egg? Either way, her intention for this photoshoot was to step up and out and have her essence captured on camera. I was delighted to be able to support this process.

Kerrie had just finished a training called "Seeing with your Heart" which she had taken an intuitive leap into, not sure of what she was hoping to gain. She shares that in this moment, she was finding deep purpose in being a grandmother and spending her time on the land. Yet somehow, the divine mystery was calling her out and the stars were aligning to tell her that now was the time to share her gifts more widely, as the world is in great need.

During an Alchemical Constellation in the training (a healing modality where through roleplay in a group, you can see dynamics that are playing out personally, within your family and/or generationally in order to heal them), Kerrie saw her great grandmother of four generations back, curled up, dying not to be seen. She had been a medicine woman who had been tortured and burned at the stake for sharing her medicine, during the time of the witch hunts. Across four generations this trauma of being seen had been passed down, and in this constellation, this trauma was unblocked.

Many of us hold the same history and have this same trauma etched into our cells. It makes being seen for the gifts that we are born with, something to be afraid of because there is a belief that we will be persecuted. And in this trauma and repression of gifts, women who are stepping out and sharing their gifts can be judged harshly, creating a vicious cycle of judging and repressing. Our judgements are the very reflections of where we are holding ourselves back -full stop. It takes great courage (or could it be patience?) to arrive at a point where finding purpose through sharing our gifts becomes more pressing than the fear of persecution.

During the training, Kerrie found that her soul offering is to become a bridge between the mainstream and sovereign birth worlds, combining her experience as a midwife and with her life experience as an older wise woman and the spiritual lessons she has gained. Kerrie sees how these two ideological worlds of birth are very divided and there is a tendency to be with two feet in one of the worlds, with little understanding or conversation between the two.

Her desire is to hold the birthing woman with complete reverence, and put the power back into her hands, creating space for her to make her own choices based on her own intuition and in connection with her power, instead of her feeling pressure from one side to 'succeed' in birth. In other words, she wishes to support birthing women to make decisions that are based on real time needs and desires from within, rather than external ideology. If that means free birth... great. If it means epidural in the hospital... great.

She sees her offering as combining art, writing, bodywork (like Qi gong), and working with the element of water, so that a woman can get in touch with herself, her power as a woman and get really clear on the birth that she is calling in. Being the bridge means that women who choose the mainstream hospital birth path (often considered as the default 'safe' option),have a taste of the more spiritual and unseen forces supporting birth, without feeling like their decisions are being judged or that they have to take radical action that they don't feel completely prepared to take.

So, there we were, holding these intentions at the heart of our journey together.

The photoshoot was a beautiful unfolding and if Kerrie hadn't have expressed that she didn't want to be seen, I would never have guessed. There we were, running and strutting up and down the beach, over rocks, at the shoreline, as though we had been friends for many years.

There were two outstanding moments for me. The first was when I asked Kerrie to embody the woman that she was becoming, the one who is a bridge supporting women to connect with their deepest power. And I saw her step into her becoming completely: two feet strongly anchored into the ground, arms reaching to the sky, speaking of love and channeling the divine. In this moment, a big ocean wave surged from the low tide and curled around the rock where we were, to meet us. It is clear - nature responds to truth.

The second awe-inspiring moment was when the sun came down and turned Kerrie into a dancing silhouette. Rainbows were bouncing off her and everything sparkled, like a magic spell. With a hill to the west, I hadn't expected such a glamourous show and I couldn't help squealing and grooving with excitement, putting myself in all sorts of positions to get a good shot. Kerrie had been on the lookout for some seaweed and she in this moment, the ocean provided.

It is crystal clear, yet never ceases to amaze me that when we are deeply embodied, we begin to speak the same language as the natural world (of which we make part), and beauty becomes apparent in all that we look to.

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Kerrie is a registered midwife, moving between her homes in both Aotearoa New Zealand and the United States. If you are seeking to connect with an elder in the birth world that holds absolute reverence for birth, while still giving credit to the present day tools/procedures available in mainstream medicine, she may be your woman! You can connect with her at Kerrie Trumble-Curtin (@selkie.woman)

or ktrumblecurtin@gmail.com